Pawlenty’s Youth Movement Plans Revealed

Item: Minnesota’s ex-Governor Tim Pawlenty insists that he, not President Obama, will win the coveted youth vote in the 2012 presidential race.

Not only that, Pawlenty revealed his secret weapon for winning over young adults. Policies to make higher education affordable? The mullet? The adorable “TPaw” self-branding? His cheeky TV ad showcasing his oh so hot “34-inch waist?”

No, the 50-year old candidate explained to the Vanderbilt University (no not that) Hustler that he had developed a special bond with 18-24 year olds because he — wait until you here this, kids — uses Facebook and accepts invites to The Daily Show!!!

Of course, that would be a bit more dope if 15 million senior citizens weren’t already using Facebook, and the other folks accepting Daily Show invitations these days weren’t senior citizens like Bob Dole, Madeline Albright, Zell Miller, Mario Cuomo, Allan Greenspan and Henry Kissinger.

– Loveland

28 thoughts on “Pawlenty’s Youth Movement Plans Revealed

  1. Mike Kennedy says:

    A bit more “dope,” Joe?

    Nice use of street lingo. I’m surprised you couldn’t fit “whack” into there as well — Eminem fit both into one rhyme line in his fantastic song with Dr. Dre, “I Need A Doctor.”

    Kudos for the attempt, though. BTW, is waist size hot or something? If so, 34 seems a little large to me.

    1. Jim Leinfelder says:

      Joe was being ironic, Mike, to put Pawlenty’s tin-ear (and apparently not just his) in starker relief. Sheesh.

  2. Joe Loveland says:

    Mike, I wasn’t being a middle aged guy trying to be hip. I’m painfully aware of how un-hip I am. I was intending to make fun of middle aged guys who try too hard to be hip.

    Should it have been “doper” instead of “more dope???”

    Funny thing about that old Pawlenty campaign ad where he prominently touts his 34 inch waist size: Unless my considerable Interweb research skills are slipping, that video is NOWHERE to be found online. That was one of the strangest moments in the history of political advertising. He was intending to be cute, but it was just odd. I think Vin Weber has the master videotape locked in a safe somewhere.

    The average waist size for American men apparently is 40 inches, up five inches over the last four decades. So, give slim Tim his props.

  3. Mike Kenendy says:

    No, you were right — it’s dope. I only know this because I have a 19 year old who has me listening to 50 Cent, Eminem, Drake, Dr. Dre etc. because it’s all on my I-Tunes account.

    I’m not hip either, but I like a lot more of the “hip shit” than I ever thought I would when I was in my 40s.

    Sad that the average waist size for men is now 40. I can remember when it was at least 6 inches less.

      1. Festus says:

        sorry… you can’t see the description of that video unless you play it on youtube, so here it is:

        Brooklyn Rapper Jeao Weston in Branson

  4. Mike Kennedy says:

    Leave it Festus to find something discussed. You constantly amaze me at your ability to find this shit. I know, Joe, I felt the same way about hip hop and rap. I’m one of the last guys I thought would ever turn.

    1. Joe Loveland says:

      I’m being a smart ass, Mike. I listen to everything, including a bit of hip hop and rap, and I wouldn’t be caught dead in Branson. About the only thing I can’t stomach is contemporary country music.

      1. Erik Peterson says:

        The guy that tells you he listens to everything, even a little rap, but not country….

        Is that a trope, stereotype, or cliché? I lean to trope, but I’m afraid I use it imperfectly.

      2. Joe Loveland says:

        Guilty as charged. Should have said “lots of different types of music.” Since I’m in the confessional, I’ll admit I’m mostly not much of a bluegrass, hair/glam metal, opera or muzak kind of guy either.

      3. Erik Peterson says:

        This is all sort of trope–ic, to coin a phrase. The deft deployment of cliché to gain the benfit of sub-textual assumptions. Pawlenty wearing Facebook. Music lovers eschewing country music because at a minimum they think liking it makes them look unhip.

        I’ll just say this. The best guitar players in the world are in country music. The 2nd best are in hair metal.

      4. Joe Loveland says:

        Maybe that’s it, I have a guitar phobia. The guitar playing in country music and hair metal does does seem accomplished. No argument there. I just don’t like all kinds of music. It’s hard to describe why we like and dislike various kinds of music. Really truly, I didn’t intend to communicate any subliminal value or fashion judgement when I mentioned my musical tastes. My likes and dislikes just are what they are. I won’t name names, but there are a lot of musicians on my ipod music library that would be mocked by hipster music critics.

      5. Mike Kennedy says:

        Erik is right. Sometimes we say what we like based on perception, like the brands of clothes we buy, beer we drink etc.

        I enjoy Zach Brown Band, Carrie Underwood, Faith Hill, Toby Keith etc., but I’m not a broad fan of country or a fan of a lot of rap or even pop. There is good shit in every category, pop, hip hop, rock, techno/dance, metal, country…..and there is a lot of shit in all of them.

        And there is a lot of crossover. I dropped a jacket off to a leather shop the other day and the guy was listening to “country rap.”

        Actually, it didn’t sound half bad.

      6. Erik Peterson says:

        You geezers are setting up straw men and beating the shit out them.

        I didnt say Hendrix or Clapton weren’t great.

      7. PM says:

        “I’ll just say this. The best guitar players in the world are in country music. The 2nd best are in hair metal.”

        No straw men here, just a direct response to your claim. you say that the best guitar players are in country music, and give no examples or anything at all to support this claim. i respond with jimi Hendrix and the Ventures, who are among the best guitar players ever, and not from country music.

        Do you think that there are country music guitar players who are better than Clapton or Hendrix? or better than Jose Feliciano? or better than Django Reinhart? or Duane Allman? or B. B..King? or Stanley Jordan?

      8. Erik Peterson says:

        PM: I was initially drawn to the linguistic silliness and ideological / cultural subtexts inherent in a statement like, “I like all kinds of music, even a little rap, but I can’t stand country.”

        That’s something (young) cultural liberals say. It a trope, and perhaps a bonus point trope for wrapping a little urban pretension with white guilt.

        Anywho, I think Loveland was prepared to acknowledge that as at least silly, so I wasn’t going to flog it. That last statement about the competency of various genre guitar players: anecdotally, I think there’s more than a kernel of truth there, but I offered it in passing and with a little irony. I’m not prepared to quantify it. As a literal statement I’ll concede it until that time until we can sit down together and review a census.

  5. Mike Kennedy says:

    Haha, Joe. You and me both. I consider myself pretty open to music but country……………ah, I’ve tried. Can’t get into it. BTW, visited my dad down in Branson about 15 years ago when he lived there. It’s a beautiful area, but I stayed away from the shows.

  6. Joe Loveland says:

    To make a more serious point, this “hey look kids, I’m on Facebook too!” episode is classic Pawlenty.

    His tenure was chock full of this kind of style over substance. He is one of the more skilled players of the political game that I have ever seen, but it usually seemed to be style of substance: Spotlight the “no new taxes” hoo hah while dramatically raising “fees” and passing the tax buck to local leaders. Speak lovingly about “Sam’s Club Republicans” while pushing property tax increases onto the Sam’s Club shoppers.

    And flash the Facebook cred to the college kids, after jacking up tuition costs on them. Classic TPaw.

    From Minnpost:

    Between the years 2000 and 2007, in-state tuition increased by 68 percent at the University of Minnesota and 55 percent in the Minnesota State Colleges and Universities (MnSCU) system, according to the Minnesota Budget Project, an initiative of the Minnesota Council of Nonprofits.

    Meanwhile, state funding per full-time higher-education student dropped by 28 percent during the same period.

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