Republicans Embrace the “S” Word

So a president of the United States — let’s say, a liberal Democrat from Chicago — stands before the microphones and the media and the American people and says: “To right the economy, to keep this American ship from sinking, I propose a bold and sweeping economic plan that will free from debt and uncertainty the most productive generators of value and security in our society. I propose we invest $1 trillion in:

“+Retiring credit card debt, up to $10,000 per person, for people who have jobs, children, or are taking care of relatives.
+Paying off the mortgages of individuals who have owned their homes for five years or more.
+Retiring half of every student’s college loans.
+Paying off half the business loans of any individual who has started a small business in the last three years.
+Paying half the outstanding medical bills of people who have health insurance, and all of the outstanding medical bills of people who have no insurance.

“To qualify for this economic relief and stimulus, you have to earn less than $200,000 per year and have a net worth of less than $2 million. And those receiving this help will have to pledge to save one percent of their income in the coming year.

“I am convinced,” the Democratic president would say, “that this dramatic government investment will keep our economy from falling into recession and pull us back from the cliff the economic policies we’ve been following for the past eight years have been driving us so rapidly toward.”

MY GOD! Republicans all over the country would be splitting the seams of their tight tortured pants in their haste to get to the microphones and on Sean Hannity’s show to scream the filthy nine-letter word “SOCIALISM!”

But here’s a Republican president ready to throw One Billion more of our dollars at the bankers and mortgage holders and speculators who have — since the Reagan Revolution slipped the surly bonds of regulation from their greed — enriched themselves while eliminating millions of decent jobs, shrinking the income of the average worker, and eroding the foundations of our economy.

None dare call it Socialism?

Many commentators have said, since Bush announced his accelerated “Rescue the Rich” plan yesterday, that the Republicans are embracing Socialism by having the government back big business. Many commentators have said it will now be impossible for John McCain to say the Bush economic policies of the past eight years have succeeded when the economy requires such a shocking bail-out (forgetting the Republicans’ ability to stare into the cameras with absolute aplomb while saying things that are demonstrably absolute twaddle). Funny how the “S” word usually thrown at liberals’ tax proposals is now being pinned to the Republicans.

The Democratic president’s idea mentioned above is a modest proposal — bailing out citizens, rather than asking citizens to bail out big speculators.

Sounds like Socialism? So now do W and Hank the P and the remains of what was once John McCain.

(Idea stolen and elaborated on from a Mark Heaney commentary on Air America Minnesota.)

–Bruce Benidt
free payroll calculator fine

Random Election Thoughts…

  • If Brad Pitt + Angelina Jolie = Brangelina and Tom Cruise + Katie Holmes = TomKat, then what does John McCain + Sarah Palin equal?

McPalin?

PaCain?

Barack Obama + Joe Biden =

Barbiden?

OBiden?

  • My favorite line from the campaign trail lately:

Obama: “John McCain wants to take on the Old Boys Network. The Old Boys Network? In the McCain campaign, that’s called a staff meeting.”

I particularly like Senator Obama’s delivery.  Worth clicking on the link.

  • My favorite unapproved campaign sign:

– Austin

PS – For what a bunch of lefty, wacko, typographers and graphics types think of Team McCain’s choice in fonts (which I had to find out in order to create the sign), click here. expense fine