Now even one of the most-respected news readers in town is doing it.
Keep reading to find out which Twin Cities journalist takes a little off, shimmies for a few honky-tonk beats, winks through expensive makeup, breaks for a commercial message, then comes back and lets it all hang out.
But first, we bring you a word from HedgeHog Swag Management, Inc. HedgeHog is the hedge fund for people who already have way too much money, but occasionally see someone swooshing by in an even-bigger boat or parking an even-more-ridiculous gashog SUV in their seven-car garage. Tired of being made to feel small by zillionaires? Want to trade in that little place in St. Bart’s for something astoundingly ostentatious in Monte Carlo? Sign up with HedgeHog today, moneygrubbing for the truly rapacious. Leaving the merely wealthy in the dust since 2006.
Now, you’ve seen how newsreaders on TV will tease a story, hoping you’ll stay tuned through the next commercial to find out what’s going on? Or there will be the quick little flash of skin at about 9:30 p.m. — “Which Minnesota senator was found in bed with either a dead girl or a live boy yesterday? Stay tuned, we’ll tell you all the glorious details on our Ten O’Clock Snooze.”
I hope people like Don Shelby find it a little uncomfortable, this hustle. “Coming up next, a Southern Minnesota town is flattened by an F-16 tornado, bodies falling out of the sky, the Courthouse moved two counties over. We’ll tell you which town, after these irritating jingles from Menard’s.”
Just spit it the hell out, Don.
So this morning, even Cathy Wurzer’s doing it. “Coming up, we’ll talk about who’s the leader among Democrats in fund-raising.”
Come on, I’m walking around, trying not to shave off parts of my face that I shouldn’t, and I only hear pieces of the newscast. I don’t want to slow down and make myself late waiting to hear the punchline. Just tell me — “Obama leads the money race today…”
Being Public Radio, they aren’t trying to hold me through a commercial, but it seems the habit in news has gotten so ingrained that even my main news squeeze is doing it now.
Let the hustlers hustle — broadcast news should try to retain a semblance of credibility.
Besides, I don’t really want to see Shelby take it all off. And I’ll leave the next line up to you…