Roger Clemens has signed with the Yankees for one million smackers a game.
This paragon of sportsmanship said Sunday that he’s coming to New York for one purpose — to win a world championship. “Anything else is a failure,” he said.
A failure? Way to communicate a great example.
If you try hard, play fair, do your damnedest and fall short, you’re a failure. Thanks, Rocket. From all of us who haven’t won a Pulitzer, Nobel Prize, American Idol coronation, Stupid Bowl, spelling bee, state championship or chile cookoff — thanks a lot for calling us losers.
You gotta pity George Steinbrenner and the whole Yankee coven. They pay all the money in the world trying to buy their way to the top, and way more often than not it doesn’t work. Ain’t this America? Shouldn’t money be able to buy you any damn thing you want?
Yes, Roger’s a strong competitor. And trying hard is good. But Roger is also an odious creep. He flung Mike Piazza’s broken bat back at Mike some years ago — a sharp shard of hardwood that could have pierced Piazza’s eye. It was clearly assault with a deadly weapon. But oh, that’s just Roger. A minor leaguer threw a bat at an ump — a whole bat, less deadly than a fractured one — and he got suspended for 50 games. But The Rocket — he’s a good example. For aspiring Enron execs.
Sorry, Roger. I’ll be pulling for every batter against you. Justin, Torii, Cuddy, take aim at them fences. Let’s make The Rocket chomp on his words.